When I first met my wife, I was drawn to how hardworking she was. Every time she came over, she would wake up early, cook, clean, and wash everything. Even when I tried to help, she would ask me to relax, insisting on doing it all herself. That quality of hers was so attractive, and it played a big part in my decision to marry her.

Unfortunately, three months into our marriage, things changed. At the time, she didn’t have a job and had been actively searching for one before we got married. But as soon as we tied the knot, her job hunt stopped. I didn’t complain because I assumed that if she wasn’t working, she would keep the house neat and prepare meals for us. I thought that was a fair balance. But that didn’t happen. The house would be just as messy when I returned home from work—sometimes even worse. And what was she doing? Watching Netflix.

I was always too tired to cook after a long day at work, so I would order food. Since I didn’t want to leave her hungry, I ordered for her too. When I had the energy, I cleaned the house because coming home to a messy environment only added to my stress. After two months of this, I decided it was time to have a serious talk.

Read Also: I Helped Stranger and You won't believe What He Gave Me In Return

“Honey, you know I love you, but you’re doing things that make me unhappy,” I began carefully. She looked offended, so I softened my tone. “Don’t get upset, I love you a lot, and that’s why I want us to fix this.”

“What have I done?” she asked, clearly surprised.

“Why have you stopped looking for a job? I thought you were searching for one,” I asked her.

“There are no jobs in the country, so I’m creating my own,” she explained. “I’ve been saving the allowances you give me. Very soon, I’ll open a store and sell water.”

“So, I guess that’s why there’s no food in the house either,” I replied. “How much do you need to start this business?”

“Just give me 10k,” she said happily.

I assured her she would have it by the end of the week. I also brought up the housework, and she promised to do better. For a moment, I felt hopeful. But after a month, nothing had changed. I started feeling scammed because I had given her the money for her business, but she had done nothing with it. I was frustrated, and instead of talking calmly, I began complaining.

I hated coming home to a messy environment, so I complained. I hated leaving money for food only to come home to none, so I complained. But then she started complaining back. She hated that I was constantly pointing out everything wrong. Our relationship turned into a series of arguments. I even asked her to give me back the money if she wasn’t going to start the business, but she refused. We were both unhappy and constantly fighting. Did I love her any less? No. Did I want a divorce? Absolutely not.

Then, one day, I got promoted at work. It came with a huge pay raise, but I didn’t tell my wife. We weren’t speaking much at the time. To celebrate, I went to a bar, had some beer, and reflected. That’s when a thought struck me—maybe I should rent a space where I could keep things exactly the way I wanted.

It took me some time to find an apartment, but once I did, I didn’t tell her until I was ready to move out. When I finally packed my things, I told her, “Afua, I love you very much, and that’s why I think it’s best for us to live in separate households. I’m going to leave this house and live elsewhere.”

She was shocked. “What do you mean? You’re going to leave the house your father gifted you to go rent another one?”

I nodded. She thought I didn’t mean it, but when I finally left, she started crying and begged me to stay. But after three years of enduring the same frustrations, I couldn’t change my mind.

And guess what? Now, everything is back to normal. She comes over to cook and clean, and she doesn’t want me to help—just like in the beginning. She has finally set up her business, and she constantly asks me to come home. But I love her too much to go back to living together. I like things exactly the way they are now.